Shadows Cast By Others Or By Us Standing In Our Own Sunshine?

It's never easy walking through high school in someone else's shadow. Just ask Aunt Mona in "You Again." Walking in anyone's shadow is never enjoyable, but when it's your best friend, that shadow seems to simply tower over you, even if they don't mean it to. They're often too busy being themselves and enjoying their lives to realize the shadow they cast. It's not their fault. It's who they are and no one can blame them for being liked and accepted. They're smart, they're funny, everyone loves being around them. Heck, people love the idea of being them. They're attractive, they make people laugh, they radiate confidence in whatever they do. They have so many traits that we don't - traits we wish we had but could never possibly possess. The combination it takes of personality and skill to be so "normal" seems to come naturally to them. Maybe they're not so good at basketball or track, but they're a heck of hunter, fisher, and car fanatic. Maybe speed and flexibility aren't top on their list, but honesty, trustworthiness, strength, and patience are definite, suitable replacements.

And there we are, enjoying the shade because it rules out the possibility of a sunburn but hating ourselves for bringing our best friend down whenever we're seen with them. We were never that popular or accepted ourselves, so when we're seen walking alongside them in the hallway or sitting next to them at a basketball game or the lunch table, heads begin to shake in puzzlement. Sometimes they're asked why they hang out with us. For all we know, they don't know how to respond. They're not quite sure themselves.

And then they give in and drink. They go to a party for the first time and really enjoy themselves. They realize what a great time they can have with these guys and start hanging out with them more frequently. They're too responsible to ever get involved with cigarettes or anything like that, but the door has now been opened to alcohol and it doesn't look like it will close anytime soon.

But they still find time for us. We still hang out, we still talk until one in the morning, we still go places and have great times. By now, they've mastered the idea of a "double life" and are able to pull it off flawlessly. The fact that they've now perfected another field that we lack so much experience in makes us even more in awe of what they can do. Yet sadly it also allows another difference to surface between us. Something else that has the potential to pull us farther apart has come to light. Could they really truly enjoy us that much? Do they really feel that close and connected to us? They promise friendship and loyalty, and because of everything they've done, we trust them to the very core. Yet deep down inside, we worry for them. We worry that someday they'll wake up and realize that they've wasted so much time - so many years - hanging out with us instead of doing something much more enjoyable. Something so much more meaningful with their life. What will happen when that day comes?