Day 4

Another day over. Yet another afternoon of financial accounting taking over my life. Yet another homework assignment that tells me I'm going to fail in the business world. Quite a stellar day if you think about it.

Work started out horrendously. A woman came in around 9:15. I believe she's set to get married in September and has a whole block of rooms reserved at the resort for anyone who wants to use them. Yesterday, I was handling a reservation of one individual who was looking to use a room in that block. Being new, I wasn't quite sure what I was doing, but since I'm a good little boy, I asked my manager for help. She ended up handling it, which was fine with me, and we went on our merry way. But then this woman shows up and starts freaking out about how that individual was given a rate that was way over the price that she had negotiated with the hotel earlier in the year. I had to go get another manager who helps at the front desk, and she proceeded to calm this woman down while handling the problem on my computer. While fixing this dilemma, she tried to show me how to handle these situations. Her hands were moving faster than I've ever seen, and she expected me to understand every single step, even though each step lasted a few milliseconds and then she was on to the next one. She was pushing so many buttons. She was clicking so many icons. Everything was moving too fast for me to follow. And then she left, thinking that she had done such a wonderful job. I stood there feeling incredibly stupid and dense. This job makes me feel that way every day. Everyone I work with knows how to deal with almost any problem that arises, and there I am, taking up space and cringing under the intense gazes of managers and customers alike.

The rest of the day was fine. Nothing major went wrong, which is always a plus in my book. Yet I can't get the feeling that my bosses are starting to get a little frustrated with me. I think they were hoping that I'd know more by now. But I don't. I spend eight hours a day in the main lobby and all I'm good for is making reservations. And I'm still not even sure I have that down. I've had to keep telling myself that I'll get better, but there comes a point when you just have to accept the inevitable. Was I meant to do well at this job? I don't think so anymore. And yet I'll have to stick it out for what looks like the rest of the summer because I have no other option. I'm as broke as any college student and not getting any less so for some time now. What a great twenty years I have to look forward to.