Goodbye 2011

You know that moment when you realize that so far, you've been failing so badly at life that even your 14-year-old sister is better at it than you? (Although, honestly, Emily really is rocking the early teenage life. If anyone wanted advice on how to improve their situations at that stage of life's journey, they may wanna shoot a text her way). That point, though, has been upon me for some time now. I don't know what I want to do with my life. I have no motivation, sustenance, or interest in changing the fact that to this point, I quite frankly have not taken life very seriously. And therein lies my biggest flaw: an unwilling resolve to accept reality. On my 20th birthday, I mentioned a world I've had to rebuild twice, each time adding new quirks and building new fortresses. Yet one of my fatal mistakes has been to allow imperfections to remain. Inspiration to find that perfect job doesn't exist. The power of my will lacks in even the most basic areas. The drive to improve qualities that need polishing has slowly eroded away, only to be replaced by a reluctance to accept change and how severely it is... changing... my life. It's unnerving at times to think of how everyone around me is so strong and almost, if not completely, rooted down with confidence in their beliefs, senses, and ideas. To say that I'm not quite there yet is a colossal understatement.

And yet, we've now bid farewell to another year. Another year of laughter, fun, sadness, defeat, triumph, agony, loss, and renewal... Gone. Finished. Completed. Another colossal understatement would be someone saying that 2011 went quickly. It's almost becoming cliche, isn't it? Another year of experiences, relationships, difficulties, and perseverance has been absorbed into our existence, helping to solidify our personalities, responsibilities, and character. We've inducted the most memorable moments into the Hall of Memories, where they will be forever cherished and adored. Up until this point in my life, I'm sad to say that I've mostly focused on the bad, the depressing, the sad, and the frustrating. Again - motivation to change? Practically non-existent.

But we've now entered a new year. A chance to truly start over. The ability to shake loose the bonds of previous debts and begin new transactions in life. "You only live once" is a very popular saying, and one we'll all continue to hear until the day we die. But carpe diem could hardly have said it better - it's our day. Let's seize it. It's our chance to take control of the chaos surrounding us, and by so doing, create order in the pandemonium that eternally surrounds and threatens us. It's up to us to create those memories, to forge those everlasting relationships, so that one day, we'll be able to look back on these years - every fight, every victory, every loss, every A+, every F, every promotion, every dismissal, every laugh, every tear - and smile.

And above all, we must never lose sight of the hope that we find in Jesus Christ, for it is because of him that we are able to live life to the fullest. The Bible tells us that "No one - not even one who has not heard of the Bible or of Christ - has an excuse for not honoring God, because the whole created world reveals him." God gives us blessings that we are incapable of numbering because they are as numerous as the grains of sand on the seashore. Looking back, part of a message I received contained these words: "Focus on positive things, for then you will have far greater to write about." It is with that idea that I will end: below, enjoy some of the memorable times I experienced in the year 2011. 

- Welcomed Chloe Ann Kinney into our home over the winter and became best friends during the summer.
- Enjoyed one of the greatest tennis seasons of my life. Not because of the record, but because of the people and places.
- Completed my second year of college with a stellar GPA and even better memories.
- Gained valuable experience working at King's Pointe Waterpark & Resort.
- Got a taste of the "grown-up" world during the summer because of the front desk position.
- Came to appreciate my friends even more than before because of the diversity of our work schedules.
- Came out of my shell just a smidge during the Fall Semester. As a result, two magnificent group presentations were given.
- Enjoyed rooming with Preston Sunderman for the third straight semester. Man, we certainly do have our fun.

And then it was time to pack up and head home for Christmas. The rest, as they say, is history.

Things I Learned in 2011
~ My first impressions are improving.
~ If I hate a class enough, I'll leave and go get some food. Or explore basements.
~ Some tennis shoes only last two weeks.
~ I am incredibly blessed with the greatest friends and the most loving family.
~ I'm still capable of asking out the opposite sex, however awkward it may be.
~ I made the wrong decision when I chose Business for a major.
~ To set things right, I'm gonna need to put on my big boy pants and take control of my life in 2012.

I had hoped to change the world in 2011. I now deem that an unfit challenge because it's something that is extremely hard to measure. Yet one thing is for certain: My world certainly changed in those 365 days. I've come to the conclusion that it's not possible to completely reconstruct something as complicated as "our world." Why? Because it's forever changing. So instead of some deeply intense goal, I'll simply say this: be you. Live. Love. Grow. Dare. Cry. Laugh. And never forget that you're special. More so than you can possibly imagine. Here's to making 2012 the best year it can possibly be!